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January 21, 2002 01:00 AM

Tire Business Marketplace

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    Time for a non-resolute year

    Gotta admit, we're flat tired out from hearing about New Year's resolutions.

    More than 115 million Americans decide every year to do something generally in the area of self improvement, but how many actually stick to their resolutions? Apparently not many. Business consultant Sam Geist notes that, according to the latest estimates by leading psychologists:

    * 25 percent of New Year's resolutions are broken in the first week;

    * 50 percent are dumped in the first month; and

    * 80 percent or more are broken later.

    The shrinks say the top resolution (no surprise here) is to lose weight. Second choice on the list is quitting smoking. (Maybe the third is to lose pounds by smoking.) They also claim that people under 30 make more resolutions than those over 60, and that secret resolutions almost always fail.

    Some psychologists even warn that broken New Year's resolutions are more stressful/harmful than the vices we vow to break.

    We decided to take the approach of a good friend who, like many of us, swears an oath every year to do this or not do that, then always feels bad at year's end because most of those promises fall to the wayside. So this year he resolved to gain at least 20 pounds, eat chocolate as much as possible and not worry about any other resolutions he might break. Now that sounds like a plan.

    Not country-fried

    For the first time, NASCAR is releasing a car- and racing-flavored music anthology that features rock artists (we're guessing country's been king up until now).

    ``NASCAR: Full Throttle,'' from Hybrid Recordings and Atlantic Records, has what the racing organization calls ``13 high-octane tracks'' from a variety of new and classic rock artists. Imagine hearing an exclusive track from Metallica whose ``Fuel For Fire'' is an alternate version with different lyrics than ``Fuel'' from their ``Reload'' album. Sammy Hagar has updated his classic 1984 hit ``I Can't Drive 55'' to a more-accelerated ``I Can't Drive 65'' (we presume drivers in Nevada are not included).

    Some of the other artists/cuts include Sugar Ray's ``RPM,'' the Grateful Dead's ``Alabama Getaway,'' Convoy's ``Gone So Quick Tomorrow,'' and matchbox twenty's remix of ``Stop.''

    Blake Davidson, NASCAR's director of licensing, said the Full Throttle album ``is designed to capture the energy and emotion that NASCAR racing is famous for. This is the first time we've ever brought together artists of this magnitude for a music compilation.''

    Let's hope this disc has better stuff than what happened at last year's Indianapolis 500. Remember the performance Aerosmith frontman Steve Tyler turned in, giving the ``Star Spangled Banner'' his, uh, ``special'' treatment?

    This 'n that

    Fragile-``A new idea is delicate,'' according to Charles Brower. ``It can be killed by a sneer or a yawn; it can be stabbed to death by a quip and worried to death by a frown on the right man's brow.'' His words of wisdom were mentioned in the ``Quick Bites'' e-mail newsletter published by training expert Sam Geist.

    Rick Bergquist, discussing collaborative commerce in e-business, said: ``If you are not collaborating, you are not working as effectively as your competitors are.'' That's probably true for any business.

    Meanwhile, that famous ``anonymous'' wrote: ``Yesterday is a canceled check. Tomorrow is a promissory note. Today is the only currency you have, so spend it wisely.'' And no bouncing, please.

    ***

    I don't remember-``A clear conscience is usually the sign of bad memory,'' according to comic Steven Wright.

    ***

    Then it gets easier?-Renowned actress Helen Hayes once observed: ``The hardest years in life are those between 10 and 70.''

    ***

    What's he know, anyway?-We really hate to call on the carpet someone as respected as none other than one of our country's forefathers. But being in the journalism game, we just have to disagree with Thomas Jefferson, who once wrote that ``the man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.'' (Guess he wasn't thinking of the avid tire-dealer readers of Tire Business.)

    Tire dealers' bounty?

    It was awful...just awful. Late last fall a 6-inch metal punch embedded in the pavement of Interstate 90 east of Bozeman Pass in Montana flattened tires on up to two dozen vehicles.

    Highway Patrol officer Josh Brown called the situation a ``mess,'' with cars ``stacked up at the very top of the pass'' and flat tires ``clear into Bozeman.'' A driver found an object resembling a hole punch that looked like it had been pounded into the surface of the passing lane. Luckily, there were no injuries.

    The officer advised drivers with flattened tires to contact the Montana Department of Transportation to get a complaint form. The Associated Press story didn't mention any suspects, but it suspiciously sounds like it could have been a ``business opportunity''-though we're not pointing any fingers.

    Hit the jackpot-sort of

    You wanna be a missing link of sorts? Boy, does Goodyear Canada have a deal for you if you live in the Great White North. And it'll mean more money in your pocket-that is, if you meet certain stringent criteria and don't necessarily care if you become the laughing stock of your family or circle of friends.

    The decisive factor in this gambit is your family name has to be Dunlop.

    The tire maker has perhaps taken branding to new heights with its offer of $16,000 in U.S. dollars (that's $25,000 in Canadian bucks) to persons willing to alter their family name. The company mailed 1,000 information packages across Canada to families with the name Dunlop. All a person has to do to win a portion of the loot is to legally change his or her name to ``Dunlop-Tire''-at a cost of about $125, which Goodyear will reimburse.

    A spokeswoman for Goodyear's Canadian unit told Reuters ``this has never been done before.'' (Wonder why?)

    If, for instance, 50 people named Dunlop sign up, each gets $315 from the kitty. But if the company gets only one taker, they'd get the entire 16-grand jackpot. Noting the results of a poll conducted by Decima Research of 2,000 Canadians, Goodyear said that were the price right, 37 percent of respondents indicated they'd be willing to trade their family name for a corporate brand name. And men seemed more willing than women to do it for the cash. (We're guessing some guys would do it for a case of brewskis.)

    The company spokeswoman did say the promotion was ``about having fun,'' and anyone who didn't appreciate Goodyear's funny side simply doesn't have ``a sense of humor.'' She also acknowledged there's nothing really stopping winners from dropping the ``Tire'' moniker after grabbing the loot.

    What's next? Well, we'd like to go on record as letting Bill Gates know we're available for adoption. But if he'd rather not take on another mouth to feed, we'd be willing to change our first name to ``Microsoft''-for a cool mill.

    Edited by Sigmund J. Mikolajczyk

    E-mail to: [email protected]

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