In California, a dude got pulled over by a cop while tooling along on his Harley with his dog straddling the gas tank. The patrolman cited him. Son, that's against the law-people cannot ride on a chopper's gas tank.
But officer. . . he's not a person, he's a dog, the cyclist argued.
He got ticketed anyway and, according to the news report, plans to fight it in court. And the dog was pretty upset, too. It was his first moving violation.
How's your coverage?
A headline in the Herald-Sun in Durham, N.C., got us wondering whether tire dealerships are carrying adequate insurance to cover water damage. It said: ``Parking Lot Floods When Man Bursts.''
You never know when some poor guy's going to explode on your property. Quick! Which way to the restroom?
Age-old question
Remember what General Douglas MacArthur said about old soldiers just fading away. But what happens to old astronauts? Do they travel in different circles than they used to? Or do they just kind of space out?
We may have found an answer to that conundrum, at least as far as Admiral Shepard is concerned.
The first American in space landed at the recent Automotive Aftermarket Industry Week (AAIW) trade shows in Las Vegas. He appeared at the Loctite booth, patiently, politely signing photos of himself being lifted from his space capsule oh-so-many years ago.
In the background, a company poster touted its products as ``The Right Stuff''-a take-off on the movie that chronicled the beginnings of the U.S. space program.
Swamp thang
There were mucho gimmicks and merchandising ploys at the AAIW shows. One idea considered by Goodyear never quite left the ground, or shall we say, crept out of the swamp.
The firm had separate booths at the shows for its tires and engineered products. To ballyhoo a new serpentine automotive belt, nicknamed ``Gatorback,'' one booth featured an alligator that a Goodyear exec challenged: ``You tell me if it was live or Memorex.'' (Well, we don't honestly know, but it sure looked and felt like an ersatz version of a stuffed gator.)
``We originally wanted a real live 8-to-10-foot gator for the display,'' remarked Goodyear PR guy Fred Haymond, ``but there were too many problems involved with that idea.''
``Yeah, the gator wasn't potty trained!'' another Goodyear spokesman chimed in.
'Mr. Nice Guy'
He's turned around companies-some say ruthlessly-earning him the nickname ``Chainsaw.'' But Al Dunlap is said to prefer ``Rambo in Pinstripes.''
The Scott Paper Co. chief executive rode in to save the struggling firm, doubling its stock price in 11 months. Oh, did we mention-he fired 11,200 workers in the process?
When British financier Sir James Goldsmith went after Goodyear in 1986, he relied upon his able cost-cutting aide: You guessed it-Al Dunlap.
Accused of insensitivity, Mr. D. was quoted in a Cleveland Plain Dealer article as saying, ``I don't apologize for success. I don't have a guilt trip about (the mass firings). I'm not going to apologize for all this, for hard work. That's the free-market system.''
When hired by Scott, he said: ``They could have chosen me or Dr. (Jack) Kevorkian, but I'm more fun.'' (Right!)
He chides ``too many'' execs today for trying so desperately to be liked ``that they don't do the things to be respected,'' and recommends, ``Do what's necessary to gain respect.''
The cuts he made at Scott were so severe that they produced a new phrase in the financial world: ``Doing a Dunlap.''
But from the sounds of it, maybe it should be ``Doing a Dunlop''-just ask the former employees sporting tire tracks after being run over by Big Al.